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As an INFJ, I’ve always found peace in solitude. Time alone gives me a chance to recharge, process emotions, and reconnect with myself. For many people, solitude can feel lonely or unproductive, but for INFJs, it’s essential. It’s in these quiet moments that I feel most connected to who I am and what matters to me.
Stoicism has helped me take this need for solitude even further by teaching me how to use it for growth and clarity. In Stoicism, time spent in solitude isn’t just an escape—it’s an opportunity to reflect, strengthen our values, and prepare for the world outside. Here are a few ways I’ve come to value solitude and use it as a tool for reflection and peace.
Stoicism and the INFJ personality both understand the importance of stepping back. While life is full of connections, projects, and responsibilities, taking time to reset is crucial. The Stoics believed that retreating into oneself could bring strength and resilience, allowing us to approach life’s challenges with a clearer mind.
For me, solitude acts as a reset button. When things feel chaotic or emotions run high, a quiet moment alone gives me a chance to gather my thoughts. I take a walk, sit in silence, or just breathe deeply. These moments give me a renewed sense of calm and clarity, which I can carry with me as I return to the demands of daily life.
One Stoic practice I’ve incorporated into my solitude is daily reflection. The Stoics believed that by reflecting on our actions, we could learn and grow, identifying what we did well and what we could improve. Marcus Aurelius, the Roman emperor and Stoic philosopher, famously wrote in his journal each night, reviewing the day and preparing for tomorrow.
In my own way, I try to use solitude for this type of reflection. At the end of each day, I spend a few minutes thinking about what went well, what challenged me, and how I handled situations. This isn’t about judgment; it’s about learning. This practice has helped me become more intentional, making each day an opportunity to grow and do better.
For an INFJ, quiet isn’t empty; it’s full of possibility. Stoicism teaches that real strength comes from within, and solitude is where we often find that strength. When I sit alone in a quiet space, I’m able to connect with my own values and desires, free from the noise of external expectations.
This practice has given me confidence to make decisions based on what truly matters to me. I’m able to tap into an inner strength that’s grounded in clarity rather than influenced by outside pressures. Solitude helps me remember who I am at my core and keeps me focused on what matters most in my life.
Journaling is another practice that pairs perfectly with solitude. The Stoics often used journaling to organize their thoughts, work through emotions, and clarify their beliefs. For me, journaling is a way to take what’s swirling around in my mind and put it into words.
Each time I sit down to write, I find a little more clarity. I don’t journal to document every detail of my life but to work through thoughts, feelings, and ideas. If I’m struggling with a decision or feeling overwhelmed, writing gives me a safe space to sort it all out. It’s a way to connect with myself and make sense of the many layers of life as an INFJ.
There’s a difference between solitude and loneliness, and Stoicism has helped me understand that difference more clearly. Loneliness comes from a feeling of lack, a sense that something is missing. But solitude is a choice, a moment we give to ourselves to rest and reflect. By choosing solitude, I no longer feel alone in those quiet moments; I feel connected to myself.
Stoicism encourages us to be content in our own company, reminding us that peace comes from within. By reframing solitude as a choice rather than a circumstance, I’ve learned to enjoy my own company and find comfort in the quiet. It’s no longer something I avoid; it’s something I embrace as a form of self-care.
In Stoicism, solitude is also a time to prepare for life’s challenges. The Stoics believed that by spending time with ourselves and clarifying our values, we could face the outside world with resilience. For an INFJ, who is naturally empathetic and attuned to others, this preparation helps create boundaries, ensuring that we don’t lose ourselves in the noise of everyday life.
Before heading into social settings or tackling big decisions, I use solitude to reflect on my intentions. I ask myself what my goals are and how I want to respond to challenges. This preparation helps me stay grounded and prevents me from feeling overwhelmed or swept up in external pressures. Solitude isn’t just about rest, it’s a time to build strength and clarity for whatever lies ahead.
If you’re someone who craves quiet moments, I encourage you to embrace them. Use solitude as a time to check in with yourself, reflect, and prepare for whatever life brings your way. It’s not about withdrawing from the world, it’s about grounding yourself so you can approach life with peace and purpose.