Managing Overthinking: Stoic Tools for a Busy Mind

If you’re an INFJ, or simply someone who thinks deeply—overthinking is probably familiar territory. Thoughts pile up, past conversations replay, and the “what ifs” can start to take over. Over time, I’ve learned that overthinking doesn’t mean I’m wrong or that I have to change who I am. But it does mean I need tools to manage it.

This is where Stoicism has been invaluable. Stoicism doesn’t tell us to stop thinking, nor does it demand constant positivity. Instead, it offers ways to handle overthinking with a little more peace and focus. Here are some Stoic practices I’ve found especially helpful.

Shift Your Focus to the Present Moment

One of the most powerful ways to calm an overthinking mind is by coming back to the present. As INFJs, we often get caught up in past mistakes or future possibilities. But the Stoics remind us that the only moment we can truly influence is the one we’re in now.

The Stoic philosopher Seneca wrote, “We suffer more often in imagination than in reality.” This reminds me that worrying about things that haven’t happened yet, or rehashing things I can’t change, only distracts me from what’s actually happening now.

Whenever I notice my mind spiraling, I take a moment to breathe and focus on my surroundings. It’s simple but effective. I remind myself that right now is where my power lies—not in the past, not in the future, but here.

Set Boundaries with Your Thoughts

Stoicism encourages us to examine our thoughts and separate what’s helpful from what isn’t. For an overthinker, this is a lifesaver. It’s easy to believe every thought deserves our attention, but that’s not true. The Stoics teach us to ask: Is this thought helpful? Is it leading me to action, or is it just draining my energy?

For example, if I catch myself replaying a conversation, I ask, “Is there something I can learn from this, or am I just fueling doubt?” If it’s the latter, I remind myself that I have the power to let it go. This boundary-setting isn’t about ignoring my thoughts; it’s about choosing which ones to invest my time and energy in.

Practice Negative Visualization

“Negative visualization” might sound strange, but it’s a classic Stoic technique that’s surprisingly calming. It involves imagining how things could go wrong—not to scare ourselves, but to prepare. For someone who overthinks, this practice provides a way to face fears directly without letting them grow out of control.

For example, if I’m about to start something new and feel overwhelmed by what might go wrong, I’ll take a moment to visualize some of those scenarios. What if it doesn’t go perfectly? What if there’s a setback? By visualizing these possibilities calmly, I’m better prepared for them, and they feel less daunting. This practice helps me feel more grounded, reminding me that challenges are just part of life.

Remember That Thoughts Are Not Facts

One of the most freeing lessons from Stoicism is realizing that not every thought represents reality. Marcus Aurelius, the Roman emperor and Stoic philosopher, often reminded himself to examine his thoughts before accepting them as true.

This perspective is especially useful when overthinking gets me caught up in negative self-talk or “what if” scenarios. By reminding myself that thoughts are simply mental events, not necessarily the truth, I gain some distance from them. I can acknowledge a thought without letting it drive my actions or emotions. It’s like creating a little space between me and my mind, which helps a lot when overthinking is in full swing.

Use Journaling as a Release

Stoicism values self-reflection, and journaling is a practice the Stoics often used to organize their thoughts. For me, journaling is an essential tool to manage overthinking. When my mind feels like a busy intersection of thoughts and worries, putting everything on paper brings clarity.

Each night, I write down whatever’s been on my mind that day—big or small. Sometimes, just seeing my thoughts on paper helps me recognize which ones matter and which ones I can let go of. It’s a practice that doesn’t take much time but creates a huge sense of relief. Journaling has become a way to “close out” each day, making space for a calmer mindset moving forward.

 Accept Imperfection with Amor Fati

As an INFJ, I often want things to go “right”—I want my relationships to be meaningful, my work to matter, and my decisions to feel purposeful. This drive for meaning can sometimes fuel overthinking, especially when things aren’t perfect. This is where amor fati, or “love of fate,” comes into play.

Amor fati is about accepting life as it comes, even the parts that aren’t ideal. When I catch myself obsessing over details or replaying scenarios, I remind myself that I don’t need to control every outcome. I can do my best and let the rest unfold. This acceptance helps me step back and let go, allowing life to unfold without feeling like I have to manage every aspect.

 Take Action When Overthinking Paralyzes You

Finally, the Stoics encourage action over excessive thought. For an INFJ, who may spend a lot of time in their head, this has been especially valuable. When I get caught up in overthinking a decision or project, I remind myself that taking action—no matter how small—is often the best way to move forward.

Instead of waiting to feel “ready,” I focus on taking one small step. This might mean writing a single sentence if I’m stuck on a big project or reaching out to someone if I’m worried about a relationship. Taking action breaks the cycle of overthinking and builds confidence, helping me focus on what’s in my control.

If you also find yourself stuck in endless thought loops, try out some of these Stoic tools. They won’t eliminate overthinking, but they can help you create a healthier relationship with it. Remember, it’s not about changing who you are, it’s about finding ways to be at peace with your mind.

Overthinking is a part of who I am, but with Stoic practices, I’ve found ways to manage it without letting it take over. By focusing on the present, setting boundaries with my thoughts, and learning to take small steps forward, I’m able to find more peace and clarity.

-Eli